On Integrity
Integrity has taken a back foot in today’s society. You just need to turn on the news on TV or radio or read or listen to stories on the Internet or social media to see how power and money have corrupted people. Gone are the times when you had role models you admired and lived up to. Society drives youngsters to mimic their favorite athletes, music superstars or film heroes many of whom despite their individual talents do not have the best character. Their talent whether natural or developed is admirable, but lacking role models many of them never really had anyone to mold their characters.
A lot of this character molding begins at home. I distinctly remember this incident from my childhood. My mom had sent me to a store to buy some groceries. I think I bought myself some candy in addition to what she had asked me to. She caught me sitting on the terrace eating candy later that day. She gave me a very important lecture that day on honesty and the importance of owning up to what you have done. The foundation of my value system started then.
The foundation of our value system is laid at home and I was fortunate to have several people to look up to whilst growing up my parents, grandparents and uncles and aunts. Being a parent now makes me realize how important it is for me to demonstrate the right behavior consistently. Like it or not, our kids are watching and imbibing as they grow. They also pose some interesting dilemmas as they are growing up. Plagiarism and digital piracy are big topics that are highlighted as early as in elementary school these days. Next to parents and family, teachers play a critical role in developing character.
I vividly remember this example from my high school days in Vidya Mandir. My math teacher, late Ms. Alamelu Gopalan a very talented lady, had taken a vacation day. She had scheduled a test on her day off and sent our ED ( engineering drawing) master to supervise on her behalf. Now the class had not much respect for this gentleman and liked to heckle him. So once the test began there was a lot of talk and exchange of information in the class. I was solving the test and was not sure how to tackle one of the problems so I looked at Kumaran who was sitting next to me and asked him. Even before he could respond, Ramakrishnan our ED master (I think that was his name) walks to me and says that he is going to report me in to Ms.Alamelu for copying. I was flabbergasted, for I was just trying to engage in a conversation to clarify the question. The next day Ms. Alamelu, pulls me aside privately and tells me, B, I didn’t expect this from you, you are a good student why did you have to resort to copying. She goes on to say that she has full confidence in me and asks me to come after school and do a retest which I did and aced. She taught me an important lesson that day which I have carried through my life. There are no shortcuts in life. One should strive to prevent group think or behavior from ruining your hard earned reputation. It is not what you accomplish but how you accomplish it that matters.
Teachers make a great impression on the character of their students. Having a bad teacher who teaches their students short cuts or how to beat the system, so they can make sure their ratings are maintained are a bane of society. Football and basketball coaches who twist the rules to bring in the best athletes and then condition them to win by all means are doing no service to their students. Society should shun them and expose them and protect their students whose fragile minds they are shaping.
I came to the USA in the late 80’s to pursue higher studies. I had never worked in my life before that. You might think of me as a spoilt brat. I was fortunate to have my dad pay for school and had not really needed to fend for myself till then. My first summer I took up the job of painting benches. Wooden benches had to be coated with paint every year to prevent them from decay. Baking in the sun and painting for minimum wage was really not my cup of tea and not an easy task for someone born with a silver spoon. One of my co-workers, was Angel ( I am going to call her that, for I don’t recall her real name). She was a local, a freshman or sophomore also doing the job to make some money. One day she found me and my friend sipping coffee thirty minutes before our time was up. We had finished early but had not clocked out. She was livid (rightfully so) for she was working hard whilst we were sipping coffee after a full day of painting. She reported us to our supervisor after telling us she would do so. He didn’t do anything about it. But she left an indelible impression in my mind. It was not right on our part to have not clocked out before we sat to sip some coffee. By speaking up that day Angel taught me an important lesson on work ethics that is hard to forget.
Our character is shaped by our families, our teachers our friends and folks we work with. Be careful what you do or say for one day it might be written up in a newspaper. Integrity is the foremost of our values. None of us are perfect and we all have blemishes that we are not proud of. But learning from our mistakes and being true to ourselves is something no one else can teach us. We have to want to be the people we are for after all our values are a reflection of who we are. Life puts us in situations where it’s easy to take the less difficult path which might be against our values. Having the courage and determination to face those situations and have our core values drive our behavior is what we should strive for. So I say let us all rise to the occasion and make this world a better place for all of us by making the right choices and get our society back on track to greatness. For after all it is the behavior of the many that should define our society and not the greed and self serving nature of the few.
